Pocket Guru followers, please welcome Frances Desmone! She is an expert in women’s health specializing in Mastering Menopause. Below she discusses her journey through body worries, to body love.
For over 40 years, I’ve gotten grief for the way I look:
‘You’re cute but chunky’
‘If only you lost a few pounds you could find a husband’
‘Who would want you’
‘You’d be so much better looking’
‘I’m just worried about your health’
But the thing is all that dieting made me heavier – you know what I mean… lose 15lbs, gain 25lbs, over and over again. But on some level those extra pounds kept me safe, safe from unwanted and often scary attention from men.
I’m a curvy woman, athletic and muscular. Why isn’t there a tab for that on dating sites? I’ve read multiple profiles where a man will have no preference for age, height, race, religion, education, income, kids etc… but you’d better be skinny!
After a truly adventuresome life of sailing offshore, becoming a chef and a healer, my body has suffered injury, illness and inactivity. And surprise! I’ve never loved my body more than right now.
It has taken me on cross country trips to Europe and Antartica. I’ve studied for a Masters degree while waiting tables and teaching sailing. My body has survived crippling back pain, a terrible sweet tooth, knee surgery, and Lyme.
It’s a work in progress my relationship with my vessel. Every day I thank it, giving appreciation for all that we’ve done together. When that inner mean girl gets on a tirade about how my pants, or that pretty suede skirt I bought when 10 lbs lighter, don’t fit, I give thanks and gratitude that I can hike up 3 floors everyday, and try not be mean when I trip and fall again! Sailors tend to be klutzes on the land. At least I have good hand eye coordination!
It’s a daily practice, this loving my body meditation. Scars, bumps, hair, all of it. I like to spin a pattern to relieve the angst. I’m the luxury edition with all the bumps, plush seating, and fine craftsmanship my genes could muster.
Find our more about Frances Desmone at www.navigatingwellnessllc.com